... the irregularity of the heart ...
ON MODERN STOICISM The Irregularity of the Heart I think I first realized the lie in my early 30s. Not while poring over the meditations of Marcus Aurelius in a bookstore, feeling the weight of a 1,800 year old mind who is now so in fashion. Not while breathing in the flowers and essential oils in a studio, surrounded by 30 identical bodies in some pilates or yoga pose. It was after a really "good session" at the gym. As I stepped into the shower, feeling the sweat, I felt totally empty, or maybe " unfulfilled " is a better word. That I’d actually achieved anything by conquering my own supposed, so-called personal best, that my body had actually done what I was asking it to do in the period I’d set aside for this task, and that my will had carried me through the undoubtedly tiring task of forcing my body into the demanded positions in order to lift the required amounts of resistance weight. When the full weight of the absurdity of it all finally dawned on me, that...